Thursday, January 23, 2014

Burning Hockey Questions I Need Answers For

Lately my husband and I have been watching a lot of hockey. Truthfully, I'm really only watching it because of him. Nate's a hockey guy, and that's actually the one sport that I really know nothing about. So, in trying to learn the game and watching them play, there's a few questions that I've been wanting to ask: 

What is "off sides" and is it the same "off sides" as in football?

You're allowed to punch people in the face but you sit in the penalty box for tripping someone??

Who are they calling? Is there a bullpen somewhere I don't know about?

What's a Canuck?
Any time there's an icing call it makes me want, well, icing. 

How can you physically keep your eye on the puck with how fast it moves?

How do those referees not get trampled to death?
...or maybe they do?

Toronto Maple Leafs? Is that a typo?

If this is women's hockey...can I play?
...and where can I find a bottle of champaign that big? Or is that a Canadian thing? 

On a scale of Jennifer Lawrence to Justin Bieber, how controversial is Instant Replay in the sport of Hockey?

Enforcers - they play hockey, or their only job is to fight? 

Puck puck bo buck banana fana fo....

What's a Hat Trick, and does it involve Magic?

Lions play hockey???!!

Is the Flying V still a thing?

One thing I do know for sure:
Ducks fly together

 photo townsend-sig_zpsd6f7a124.jpg
Linking up with Sarah for Fan Friday!
Venus Trapped in Mars


  1. Ha! :) hockey is my fave!! Off sides is when a player skates to the other side before the puck reaches that side :) I've watched many, many hockey games in my day so I gotcha ;)

    1. And are you really asking what a hat trick is? Haha, I'm not sure if you're being sarcastic through out this post or for reals. A hat trick is when a player gets 3 goals in one game. :)

  2. can i just say that this "Puck puck bo buck banana fana fo...." killed me...
    and the fact that you added the mighty ducks to this = amazing. seriously amazing.
    i want to watch MORE hockey! we have a local team that is pretty dang good - i just need to get my butt to the rink!

  3. This is the greatest post ever. I giggled the whole way through. Please someone answer these questions because I know NOTHING about Hockey. Nothing. I was actually in Canada and asked someone to explain hockey (it was a boy, girls need to explain sports to other girls, boys are TERRIBLE at explaining). He started talking about the blue lines. That is where he started the Hockey tutorial, talking about some blue line??!! I was like, I do not know ANYTHING. Shouldn't we start somewhere else?

  4. Hahahah loved this! The lion playing hockey is simply fantastic!

  5. Aww the Mighty Ducks! I loved those movies...makes me feel so old!

  6. ahahahahaha leafs, is that a typo. omg seriously tho...

  7. I love the mighty ducks!! thats as far as my hockey knowledge goes!

  8. this made me laugh. i grew up in minnesota where hockey was the equivalent of football on a friday night and i have ABSOLUTELY no idea what any of it means. all i know about hockey is that they sell some mean nachos at those arenas.

    1. I'm gonna have to get on those mean nachos stat!! =)

  9. This made me giggle. As a Canadian I have never once questioned the Maple Leafs thing. A hattrick is when a player gets 3 goals in one game, and when it happens people throw their hats on the ice! Come to Canada (especially during the olympics!) and you will quickly learn the in and outs of hockey. Or at least start screaming at the TV. :)

  10. Offsides is when a player crosses the blue line (their offensive zone) before the puck does. That's why you sometimes see players nearly doing the splits to keep a toe on the blue line to avoid an offsides.

    Frighting is a 5 minute major penalty, any penalty can be a major (5 min) if its determined malicious intent to injure a player it can also result in a game misconduct and being thrown from the game.

    They are calling Toronto, which is where NHL HQ is they do all reviews and make the final calls, they recently screwed mike smith on what shouldn't have been a goal when they where playing.. the Toronto maple leafs (the home town team)

    A canuck is a slang term for a Canadian, specifically a french Canadian, kind of like we would say a Yankee

    You have to be a trained killer to see the puck.

    Refs get hit by pucks, slammed by players and punched in the face its quite hilarious.

    Leafs... no idea why they spell it that way... or why they spell it colour...

    Women's hockey is not always like that, there are womens hockey leagues known as beer leagues and I believe that size bottle is called a magnum. Its basically two regular bottles but for some reason magnum bottles are more than twice the price of a normal bottle. My advise, double fist it!

    Replay is individual preference, I think they get a LOT of calls wrong on replay but it can help in some situations.

    Enforcers are mostly their to protect the stars they are 4 line guys and don't get much ice time or score much, but biznasty is a Twitter legend.

    Hat trick or simply a hatty is scoring three goals in a single game, its not easy and its pretty awesome when it does happen, unless you are a goalie or a fan of the team that just gave up a hatty I'd say its magic.

    Also there is a Gordie Howe hat trick which is a goal, an assist and a fight all in one game. Some may disagree but to me a Gordie hat trick means you have to actually win the fight, some disagree.

    Lions do play hockey, that's why only killers can see the puck.

    The flying V is not a thing in any competitive level of hockey, maybe beer league. If you watch the movies nearly every time they do the flying V they would get called for offsides. The reason for the flying V in the movies was to deceive the other team about where the puck is and confusing the defense.

  11. Hockey is my favorite sport because it's the easiest one to follow along with! I actually have FUN going to the games and I'm pretty anti-sports in general.

  12. I was going to help ya, I love hockey. but looks like a few people have beaten me to it. it's a bit harder to understand than most sports (or maybe it seems that way to me since I've only recently gotten in to it.)

  13. I'm new to your blog and I was scrolling through your recent posts and the hockey one caught my attention. My fiance is a professional hockey player and this post is hilarious. Thanks for the laugh this morning! I love the blog and I'm excited to follow along!



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